6w3d

Well I tried to book a scan. In the absence of any symptoms I confess I have good days and bad. I would really like to enjoy this! Can’t get in until the 4th of May. Aaargh!!!

So it’s back to the drawing board.

On our way!

Fourth beta is in.

9812

I even smiled

How do you define insanity?

Last night after yet another completely symptom free day I decided to stop my Progesterone.  I had gone to the Dr that morning for a repeat Beta but the result was late.  She agreed with me that it sounded like a Blighted Ovum.  Notice no health professional has tried to talk me into this pregnancy yet…

 

Result came back today 2493.  I am officially gobsmacked.  This is progressing as it should.

First beta 14/15dpo 205

Second 17/18dpo 475 – doubling time 59.39hrs

Third 22/23dpo 2493 – doubling time 50.17hrs (ideally in 80% of successfull pregnancies betas will double every 48 – 72hrs

I can’t handle it.

Today I’m sad.  I have cried and cried.  I’m so sure this isn’t going to work.  I still have no symptoms.  I feel COMPLETELY NORMAL and I’m sick of my few well meaning friends who know telling me I’m paranoid and it will be ok.  I haven’t told Mum because I wanted to save the news for when I’m sure.  I don’t think that day will come.  I should get another beta tomorrow so I can at least stop taking the progesterone.  My tests have stopped getting darker.

22dpo

this was 18dpo

Results are in

Thursday was a long day.  From the 30 minute wait to have my blood test to the next 5 hr wait for the results, seemed to take forever.  

They were supposed to call me at 3.  At 5min past I rang them.  The ‘optimistic’ Dr who had advised me my pregnancy wasn’t viable in the same breath as giving me my Beta was on holidays.  A fact he had neglected to mention when he suggested that, in the unlikely event that I didn’t get my period, I go for another blood test. I was told ‘the level had risen’ I said ‘I want the number’.  ’Oh!’

The result was 475.  Which is good.  Not world shattering but certainly good.

Thursday night I slept for the first time in a week.  Typical that I actually had some reassuring ’symptoms’ just before the result.  

So, first hurdle down and several others to follow.

First Beta

I went to the Dr yesterday and asked for a Beta. Result came in at 205.  I was 15dpo so that’s pretty good.  When the Dr (not mine) phoned me with the result he said “I don’t expect that it will be viable at that level.  I hope you aren’t too disappointed”  Fortunately, although he wasn’t to know this, I had set myself up for disappointment from the moment I’d had sex.

Betabase begs to differ saying the median level at 15dpo (and I could have been 14dpo) was 135.  

So I’m still in the running and still symptomless.

Here is my FRER from 13dpo and today, 16dpo

             

And then it was 2pm on the same day….

 and I felt a bit better for about 5 minutes.  

I’ve also started Progesterone.  

I have acupuncture at 11:15 tomorrow and hopefully a Beta.

Feelings of doom

No sooner do I write the good news than it seems I’m writing the bad.  Well the feeling ‘of the bad’  Today I just can’t shake the feeing that’s it’s all over already.  Of course I have been testing like a maniac and the tests aren’t doing anything to reassure me at all.  They aren’t darker and I think they are lighter but can’t really tell that either Aaaargh!!  I still await the arrival of a concrete ’symptom’.  My boobs are less sore.  I slept well last night before waking very early.  My pounding head!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  I’d love to think I was just paranoid but my throbbing head and sudden teariness beg to differ.

Go figure – I hereby declare I no longer know my body at all.

I’ve been quietly drifting along this cycle. My FS didn’t want me to trigger and I didn’t manage to schedule a scan so I don’t know :

1. How many follicles I grew on 225iu Gonal-F
2. How many follicles I ovulated
3. Exactly when I ovulated because things didn’t add up as accurately as normal

I’m still charting and my temp remains up – of course this I attribute to the end of daylight savings which coincides with my second ‘triphasic’ temp shift.  I test on 8dpo and it is negative.  I have no symptoms at all except for some tenderness in my breasts.  I stop the Estrogen so I have a break before next cycle.

And my temperature stays up.

I have a funeral to bury my Husband’s 99yo Grandmother and this exhausts me.  That was yesterday.

Today, to humour an online friend who is stalking my chart I test with an OPK:

 So now I’m interested.  I tell my husband I’m off to the chemist and come back with the only HPT they have which is a 25iu/l and I test

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and this is what I get

 I’ll be back once I’ve composed myself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here is my chart